Wondering what I have been up to?  Another weird art obsession...pillows-so much fun.  They are up on etsy but not selling, have to figure out a better way to market stuff..these are so fun!

Just found some old art in the basement...that was fun!I have been looking at ways to market my art and taking little webinars ( all which lead to the standard, now let me tell you about my online training..all this is a value of 1200. but today .you can get it for 899.) now, I really don't mind people doing their thing and making a living-but isn't value arbitrary?  I f I put a value on my art that seems outrageous to me, would I still sell it?  Would I sell more because of perceived value?  Should I make up content or make art that caters to an audience instead of making what I want to create?  Is that how one makes a living doing this?  It might be a really interesting experiment to do ...If one, for instance, did some fun paintings with inspirational sayings and marketed to a very select audience, I wonder what would happen?  But would I feel authentic doing that?  And does it matter....lots of questions....

Something has taken over my brain and I have been making dolls for the last couple of weeks non stop.  Its been so much fun creating all these different little characters, painting them sewing and stuffing them.  I was actually gleeful for about 10 days loving what was happening...and then THAT thought came.....why am I doing this?  What am I getting from this? Why am I wasting my time?  Why don't I get a job? What am I trying to prove? Why aren't I painting? I am not a doll maker, what the hell am I doing???????  My brain-like everyone else's, has its go to tapes of self disgust that are triggered, at least for me, when I am in the zone and happy and then suddenly realize its not WORTH something I am not MAKING MONEY.....I am trying to just have the feelings and keep going..I listed a couple of these on etsy today (another mind trap-why aren't I selling anything? Why do I even try) and I will try just to let it go and keep working....and love that gleeful state just for the state itself

Jan 1st!!!  Happy New Year!  This year I promise to do more of what I love and quit thinking that  that is is somehow unworthy because it isn't bringing money. That I may be wasting time that could go to pursuit of cold hard cash.  So I spent ten minutes with one of my favorite things-old ladies on garbage bags with charcoal.

Quick sketch in between learning lines...did not have any good pencils in the house and the ones I had were dull..ran around actually yelling a sharpener, a sharpener my kingdom for a sharpener!!When worlds collide...
One of my all time favorite movies is Mary Poppins, I always thought the bird lady was so lovely and so melancholy..I made up a story that she had a good home to go to and was well loved so I would feel better when it came to her part. I just saw the Tippi Hendren Barbie from the birds, so I had birds on the mind..

gotta go learn those lines

Re opened my etsy shop!!  Why, I imagine you asking me, if indeed you would, why did you let it close???  Because I never made that many sales??  Because you are an untalented wanna be??  Because someone may find out you are an impostor?? Or you were lazy..or you thought what is the point??

D. All of the Above

But guess what-I don't care any more..because bottom line I have a blast doing it AND when I do sell something (which I do) I often get the best responses to my work and it warms my heart...
To that end whipped out some fun fairies today, these are really, really small (2.5 x 3.5) and its a challenge to work that small.  So onward and upward!!  And tomorrow, who knows what I will come up with!!!

Uninspiring day..one of those days where one starts to look at the want ads and wonder why keep trying. Would a steady paycheck make so much difference that I could leave all these art thoughts behind? Thats okay, this too shall pass, I know that now, but when my ideas outweigh my skills I sometimes want to pull the covers over my head instead of plodding on..sio I made myself sit and just play with pastels for a while......